Sigh

I don’t know how the fuck you took the air from me, Because I’m so comfortable with suffocating. So used to the pain, the lack, the absence,  That it’s made a nesting home deep inside of me.  Black to red to white then blue, Crying rivers just for you. I was the unforgiveable, the ultimate and unforgettable, Made weak, all for you.  Valued superiority, in bed and conversation, I like being in charge, making your eyes turn soft.  I am hard, cold cut and icy steel, How the fuck are you the one to make me melt? See I’m used to hurting, Just alone when no one can see it. But you’ve impaled, I can’t hide it much longer, I fucking miss you.  -H May 25, 2019

My heart is bleeding.  Scarlet crying,  Crushing the soul beneath.  There is a weight in my chest, Lungs squeezed by ribcage. Sharp ebony under this blanket of skin, Fragile to you,  Imprisonment to me.  My heart is bleeding. My skin is left burning From the absence of you.  -H March 10, 2020

I was always that kid afraid of the dark To be hidden from the light, vulnerable to the claws of the unknown. I've grown to see the childish foolishness of this fear The real horror is the exposure to myself, To be vulnerable to the instability of me. -H March 4, 2020